I Gave Myself 60 Minutes to Write a Blog
For my most recent blog post, I have been sitting on a few ideas, but because I think everything I do requires this profound foundation of planning and editing (music being chief among those), I’ve yet to carve out the time to make progress.
This morning I woke up with what looks like on the calendar as a blank day, no class/rehearsal/teaching, nothing. As I walked my dog, I had the thought, “What if I made myself blog in an hour, from start to finish?” I am among the many that love to wait for the perfect time to do things, I hate short notice, feeling rushed is a cause for panic. Yet, what is life if not a constant adjustment and readjustment of the plan? If you want to look at it from a certain perspective, life is just making a schedule work until you are no longer around to make a schedule work. That sounds a bit nihilist and isn’t really my intent. Rather, maybe we should be thankful for the deadlines and the spinning plates; it means we are alive and doing *something*, no matter how big or small.
All that said, I’m embracing the challenge (52 min left). Picture and all, this will be on my website, should I post it even if it’s not finished??? We’ll see.
I think what I’m putting to the test is the following: Exemplary (took 40 seconds to spell that right) work is the byproduct of years of focused progress toward excellence. I aim to be methodical and well thought out *so that* on the occasions where I must wing it, I do so in a way that is convincing enough. Not convincing enough, perhaps, to fool people that what I just did was the specific product of hours on that thing, but rather that I’m simply competent enough to get the job done even when the red carpet wasn’t rolled out for my process. (Currently blanking on my subtopics… great)
NFL Quarterbacks Are Helmet Wearing Recitalists (44 min left)
My wife and I have enjoyed watching most of the NFL Playoffs together. Something she pointed out is that there must be a psychological similarity between an NFL Quarterback and a musician giving a recital. I love this point because it’s not hard to draw the parallels. Quarterbacks in the playoffs clearly come in with a game plan (musicians come in with a plan for how to get from one end of the recital to the other), but a perfect performance is realistically unobtainable. I feel for QBs, because their cracked notes and memory slips come in the form of interceptions commentated by Joe Buck that led to Twitter rants and TV Shows talking about why “they’ll just never get it”. The closest thing we see as musicians to this is reviews by music critics, and that’s heavy enough, but imagine if Stephen A. Smith posted a video of him in a Cowboy hat laughing at you every time you went out and performed poorly. No, thank you.
*slowing down for a second to try and remember what my second point was*
The Power of Community
I wasn’t really keen on doing trombone choir at BU this semester. I’m truly All-But-Document, my last two remaining items are my lecture recital next Monday and my final recital at the end of April (ah 28 min!). The class meets on Wednesdays from 8-10pm, and I’m 32 with a wife, a dog, and job application documents to write. However, I realized a few weeks ago that the community that those two hours bring is a valuable asset in my life. If you reading this have ever had to be outside the context of school and are pursuing auditions, professional performances, recording projects, or anything in between, it is a lonely place to be. When you are the best and worst thing you’ve heard all day, every day for months on end (like during the pandemic), you are not only staying stagnate, but your ability to perform is undergoing legitimate atrophy.
In just two rehearsals this semester I have been provided with opportunities to conduct, play leading parts, supporting parts and apply all the things I’m doing in my own musical cubicle daily. This is something to consider also, and it applies beyond music. When you have a social component that compliments your colleagues, performing in front of them or along with them is a whole lot easier. If I were to see no one at BU for the next three months and then just pop out to do my last recital, do you know how much pressure I’d put myself under? I can already tell you I’d be thinking, “Ugh, they haven’t seen me for months, and I’ve been doing all this work. It has to be THE BEST THING I’VE EVER DONE” – GROSS, what an awful way to have to go out there and be an artist. I’m much more excited to go out and say, “I’m performing for my friends, and that status isn’t at stake today no matter what.”
Update On My New Years Alternations
Not great!!! At least not where I want them to be yet. I have a hard time reading for fun right now, and late-night scrolling makes me feel close to the happenings of my friends. Neither of these are cardinal sins, so I won’t be too hard on myself. That said (33 min), I’m aware that these are still aspects I want to see undergo a slight alteration, so I’m not abandoning my search for a more ideal evening wind down. Like I said in my last post (I think I don’t have time to look), we don’t need a new year to choose to be more mindful at any point, so every day for me is an opportunity and an experiment.
(19 min, don’t get cocky)
This has been fun! I haven’t checked my phone, email, or anything for 49 minutes. It’s proof that when we decide to truly lock in for a bit, things can get done. Whether or not what has gotten done in this hour is of significant quality, well, “That’s just like, your opinion, man.”